What I Need

I was thinking over the past few days about what I need and get from Chris.  Not because I’m not getting what I need, I do but because a friend of a friend got cheated on several times and it was with several people in a very short relationship.  They took their partner back a few weeks later and now that flowers have been given and pretty words said…they are ‘more in love then ever’ and ‘can’t wait to be together forever’.  And to be honest, the whole thing kind of makes me want to barf and stab my eyes out.  Because, really?  That’s what you need?  Flowers and a couple I love yous?  Cheat on me even ONCE with ONE person and it’s over.  I’ve been cheated on way too many times to put up with that crap anymore and so has this person.  I realize I can’t tell people what to do but I do wish they understood that there are lots of other people out there who will treat you right.  It took me so long to learn that myself that I hate to see other people just take what they think the deserve.  I know what I need…

I need someone who will take out the trash and scoop the cat poop.  Put the toilet seat down and clean up and help me go grocery shopping.  A person who will pay the bills (mostly on time) so I’m not constantly stressing about how things will get paid.  Someone to co parent with me and mean it, not just go along with what I say or tell the kids ‘because your mom said so’.  A bookworm who doesn’t take themselves too seriously.  I need someone who knows how special I am and also how special they are.  Someone who has self respect for themselves and me.  An animal lover.  A person who will give a bum a few dollars, tip generously and won’t laugh (too much) when I catch bugs and set them free.  Someone who listens, really listens, to what I have to say.  Shows their love through ACTIONS not just by buying me flowers or gifts but also understands that those are nice occasionally.  I need to laugh, a lot and feel like I’m more then a pair of boobs.  I need warming up and cuddling and to be told that I’m beautiful even if I’m wearing the sweatpants with the hole in the ass and my ugliest bra.  Someone who is in a constant state of wanting to drag me to the bedroom.  Someone who is kind to elderly and children and helps when they can.

Luckily, I found all this and more in my husband, Chris.  This is my opinion…I don’t want platitudes and something that is tense.  I don’t want to fight over stupid shit, I don’t want to fight at all, I don’t think it’s productive.  I don’t want you to just bring home flowers, say sorry and we forget about everything else.  That is not what I need.  I need someone to be real with me.